He is an equal opportunity slut.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
