So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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