These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I think people are normalizing furries
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
