yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize
