Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
