Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
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