he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
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