i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
