I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
