I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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