My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
