dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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