You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
My life is pants optional.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
Randomize
