Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
false alarm. still invincible.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
