turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
Randomize
