dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
