woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Randomize
