Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
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