I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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