It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Randomize
