I wanna passion pit in your ass
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
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