there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Randomize
