She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
did i walk over a car last night?
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
