Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
