I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
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