please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Randomize
