I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
