Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Randomize
