Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
We just shotgunned beers for America
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
Randomize
