Got a toothbrush?
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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