Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I just sucked dick on a ferry
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
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