i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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