is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
It's shark week go big or go home
Randomize
