We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Randomize
