we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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