my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
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