my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Randomize
