I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
