i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
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