In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
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