worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
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