Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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