im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Randomize
