Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
