Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
