i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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