Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
