The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
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