Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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