I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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